THROUGH THE OPEN DOOR - PART 8

Even though I had considered myself to be out of the closet for a couple of decades, I was still locked in a closet of shame. I burst out of that closet once I rejoined SAA (Sex Addicts Anonymous). What a feeling of exhilaration I experienced when I could once again walk down the streets of my hometown with my head held up high during a Gay Pride event with my parents.


By that time I was no longer with my partner. We had spent twenty-four wonderful years together, but life tossed me some lemons and I reacted by leaving him. It had also become a case of thinking the grass would be greener on the other side of the fence.


Truth be told, there is no one person who can meet all of our needs. I have since begun to build a life with another younger man from whom I am learning new lessons about becoming more comfortable with who I am. He is someone with whom I can kiss in public and walk down the street of my conservative hometown holding hands.


I am blessed that my former partner and I have remained the best of friends. My new partner has been very accepting of the importance I place upon maintaining a relationship with my first male lover. He had also been a vitally important person with whom I walked into the light of greater self acceptance. Coming out is not a single act. It is a continuing process.


My new partner and I belong to a church which embraces the sacred truths of all religions. It is also a church in which many gay and lesbian people as well as many recovering people attend. This speaks to my latest part of my self-acceptance. I have embraced a loving God who I believe truly loves me. I have come full circle after years of feeling judged by some Christians. Instead I believe in the benevolent and loving Father that Jesus portrayed as recorded in the gospels. As long as I remember this love and practice it within my life, I am free.

Books and Kindles by Author David Aujourd hui (these two below are at a special price on Kindle for $2.99)

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" Book 1
"Babes in Bucksnort" Book 2

"Putting the Pieces Together" Kindle Version only for .99 cents!

Putting the Pieces Together is an anthology of a gay man's journey toward self-acceptance. It is a poignant and intimate book chronicling recovery from mental illness, sexual addiction, and alcohol.

The Ground Report India - Guest author: Davis Aujourd hui- Do You Have a Sexual Addiction?

by Jackie ONeal for The Ground Report India

DO YOU HAVE A SEXUAL ADDICTION?

Guest Post: Author Davis Aujourd'hui

One of the latest and fastest growing addictions is an addiction to sex. It is an addiction that creates a feeling of powerlessness over one's sexual behaviors and that creates unmanageability in one's life. It can create a feeling of guilt or shame. It can ruin relationships.

It is a very real addiction that releases powerful chemicals in the brain during the pursuit of sex or while having it. It is not unusual for sex addicts to have problems with other addictions, though that is not always the case. It is a progressive disease whereby the sex addict needs to engage in increasingly more dangerous behaviors in order to get a thrill.

For some, it is not about cheating on partners. For these it may be an addiction to pornography. For others, it may be an addiction to internet hookups. The behaviors are not necessarily the same, but the end result is. Sex and fantasy about it interfere with a person's ability to lead a happy and productive life.

The good news is that help is available. A growing number of therapists are beginning to specialize in the dealing with this addiction. There are also a number of twelve-step programs that have helped sex addicts achieve freedom from sexual addiction. Not all areas of the country will have all of the programs available. The good news is that some of these programs have on-line or telephone meetings for those areas where there are no established meetings.

You will find that some of these programs may be a better fit for you than others. Some are more rigid. Some allow you to come to your own definition of what is a sexually healthy life for you. Here are some programs into which you can inquire:


Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA)

Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA)

Sexual Compulsives Anonymous (SCA)

Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)

Below, I have created a self-quiz for you to decide whether or not you may have a problem. That is for you to decide, but if you have answered yes to three or more questions, you may want to seek help.

Now try my self test:

1. My sexual behaviors have ruined relationships.

2. I find sex with others more exciting than sex with my partner.

3. My sexual behaviors have created unmanageability in my daily life.

4. I spend a lot of time on the computer looking at pornography or looking for hookups.

5. My sexual behaviors sometimes interfere with me meeting my responsibilities.

6. I spend a lot of time fantasizing about sex.

7. I try to control my sexual thoughts and behaviors.

8. I like to have sex more frequently than does my partner.

9. I have felt guilty about or ashamed of my sexual behaviors.

10. I use sex to medicate my feelings or to relieve stress.

About Author Davis Aujourd'hui :


Davis Aujourd'hui is creator of the highly- rated and hilarious Sister Mary Olga Fortitude- a series of nine books centered on religious and social satire.

He is a retired social worker, having worked for Adult Protective Services in New York. He said it enabled him to become a student of the human condition. While doing so, he developed the characters in his books in order to entertain a colleague of his using the gift of humor. He is socially-minded and spirituality, he says is the most important ingredient for him in order to maintain a happy and successful life.



Tags: Sexual Addiction , Sex Addicts , Sex Addict Anonymous , Sex And Love Addicts Anon , Sexual Compulsion , Sexaholics Anonymous