Part 5 -Locked in the Closet

I moved back to my college town and found a wonderful job working for a college textbook publisher. I moved into a happy apartment in the country and I began a brilliant career and what I thought would be a contented life. I medicated my anxieties by my increasing dependence upon alcohol and marijuana.

I proposed to my girlfriend in the spring. The timing was incredible. Just a few weeks later I had my first sexual encounter with another man. It would happen under tawdry circumstances which only continued to fuel my shame. It happened in a public bathroom.

A toxic bond was formed. I discovered that this bathroom was an easy place in which to find men interested in having sex with other men. I would return there often where I acted out my secret shame before returning to my so-called normal life. I was beginning to lead what would become an increasingly double life.

That summer, while my fiance returned to her parents' home, I met a young man with whom I began an affair. Never having realized that I could have romantic feelings toward another man had become an eye-opener. It would become the key that would eventually free me from my locked closet. In a little less than a year, I would walk through it, never realizing that I would eventually be giving up the so-called normal life.

LAUGH YOUR TROUBLES AWAY

Life may not be a bowl of cherries, but I am offering you some delectable desserts within my two Sister Mary Olga books. If you have an open mind and a zest for living, you will be able to laugh your troubles away. If you're in a place of joy, I will only increase it.

The irreverent Sister Mary Olga Fortitude is a nun who likes to nip her booze while she sends up smoke signals to God from her Marlboro cigarettes. She does this much to the consternation of her Reverend Mother who happens to be a reformed prostitute.

I throw into the mix a diverse cast of delightfully dysfunctional characters with whom to titillate your funny bone. Try out the dried out prudish prune, Priscilla Bunhead. She is in sharp contrast to the fun-loving gay cowboy chef, Randy Cowboy. Just wait until he finds out a secret beneath a nun's habit when he discovers that Sister Samantha isn't what she appears to be.

You'll meet the clown-like Lilliliver Lipstick who dabbles in the dirt with Priscilla. The two of them recruit an arch conservative minister named Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead. He and his wife, Pinky Poo, bring the Born Again or Burn Forever Disciples for Jesus to Bucksnort to wipe out what they consider to be perversion.

You've got it! Priscilla and Billy-Bob don't like gay people and there are plenty of gay characters with whom they tangle. Priscilla gets her panties in an uproar only to find that her crusade backfires on her when the townspeople of Bucksnort come out in support of their gay brothers and sisters.

You'll relate to the foibles of my cast as you learn to laugh at your own.

Take a joy ride to Bucksnort.

Visit Amazon.com where you can purchase "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" and "Babes in Bucksnort".

Just be prepared to get your own panties into an uproar.

Enjoy the journey!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Available in Paperback and Kindle Formats! Kindle Formats are $3.99. You can purchase Kindle Format and send as a gift to anyone that has an email address. 

THE CHALLENGES OF BEING A NEWLY-PUBLISHED AUTHOR

So, I've written a book and had it published. How exciting! It seems as if new doors are opening and that I have embarked upon a new career. That is true, but the challenges have only just begun. Now, the task is to get the word out. Major TV networks aren't exactly knocking at my door. Where do I begin?

These are the questions I had to ask myself after I published the highly-rated Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude which I soon followed up with the first sequel, Babes in Bucksnort. I knew that I had good books that my readers have joyously embraced. The frustrating part has been that I need exposure and that is not an easy thing to get. Nothing in life is free and promotion can be very expensive. While I have been blessed to have some resources, I am not currently in a position to spend megabucks in promoting my books.

I have had to pay to get some reviews, to create a video trailer, to broadcast podcasts, to hire a publicist who has done a wonderful job setting up blogs for me. I have paid to appear on some radio shows and now other publicists are encouraging me with promises of what they can do to help. It's just that it means more money. Unfortunately, money doesn't grow on trees.

I've had to be practical, but I have also had to cling to the faith that I have been inspired to write these books for a reason. The interest in my work is there and I have a message of hope to deliver. It is only a matter of remaining strong and believing in myself. My mantra is don't quit. Dreams do come true.

Friends have been helpful in spreading the word about my books, but it takes a domino effect to continue to spread the word. The continuing question remains, what more can I do?

I have been a student of Abraham who is channeled by Esther Hicks, a marvelous spiritual teacher who talks about the art of allowing. The premise is to become open to the abundance of the universe by focusing on the experience of emotions that feel good. She maintains that, when one does that, all desires will manifest.

That takes me back to some of the same spiritual principles that my main character, “naughty” Sister Mary Olga Fortitude, would embrace. It all has to do with eliminating doubt and replacing that with faith. It is only ourselves and our insecure egos which can block the way.

With that in mind, I am going to practice what I preach through my title character. I am embarking on a spiritual journey that embraces what I have been espousing in my books. Each day, I begin by meditating upon one of Esther's CDs about getting into the vortex. I breathe and relax. I let go of tension and open myself to the notion that it's not about work or luck. It's about letting go of resistance and allowing goodness to flow to me and through me.

I am practicing this diligently and will let my readers know how the manifestation of my desires will unfold. I am hoping to inspire others by my example; that is, that the power of our spirit which comes from our Source (God) will always provide. There is more than enough for all.

I practice affirmations and claim that which I wish to possess as if I already had it. But I keep my focus on being grateful for what I already have in my life. The blessings of love have nurtured me and my passions. I am a successful author which is something I never would have imagined. My dreams are unfolding and have already become a reality. Yours can become that too!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Both "The Misadvetures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" and "Babes in Bucksnort" are available in Paperback or Kindle. The Kindle version is at a special rate of $2.99 each

Outskirts Press Announces "Babes in Bucksnort", Author Davis Aujourd'Hui

Syracuse, NY, June 17, 2010 --(PR.com)-- Outskirts Press, Inc. has published Babes in Bucksnort: Sister Mary Olga Fortitude Book 2 by Davis Aujourd'hui, which is the author's most recent book to date. The 6.14 x 9.21 paperback in the Fiction / Humorous category is available worldwide on book retailer websites such as Amazon and Barnes & Noble for a suggested retail price of $13.95. The webpage at www.outskirtspress.com/babesinbucksnort was launched simultaneously with the book's publication.

About the Book (Excerpts & Info)

Here is the first sequel to the highly praised “The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude.” Once again the unconventional bourbon-swilling, chain-smoking nun will spin outrageously funny new tales about the residents of Bucksnort, Wisconsin while she tests the will of a reformed prostitute who just happens to be her Reverend Mother.

Unfortunately there’s trouble brewing in the Snortlands. The nasty and notorious town busybody, Priscilla Bunhead, goes on a crusade to stamp out what she calls the gay menace. That’s when she convinces her millionaire friend, Mildred Mayflower, to give away her fortune in order to bring the Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead and his Born Again or Burn Forever Disciples for Jesus to town to do the job. It will be an uphill climb for them as the closet doors of many gay people in the Snortlands burst open. Billy-Bob and his wife, Pinky Poo, will have another battle on their hands when Dimples Dufus, the heiress to the Mayflower fortune, arrives on the scene to reclaim her fortune.

In between the laughs, Sister Mary Olga continues to dispense nuggets of spiritual wisdom during her classes in Beginner’s and Advanced Holiness. Just don’t take seats near the flatulent child named Fartley Dinkledorf or his lecherous one-hundred five year-old grandfather, Poopsy. The bottom line is that everyone is welcome in Sister Mary Olga’s classes. Join the diverse cast of characters for a joy ride that will tickle your funny bone until it aches.

Deftly constructed at 206 pages, Babes in Bucksnort: Sister Mary Olga Fortitude Book 2 is being aggressively promoted to appropriate markets with a focus on the Fiction / Humorous category. With U.S. wholesale distribution through Ingram and Baker & Taylor, and pervasive online availability through Amazon, Barnes & Noble and elsewhere, Babes in Bucksnort meets consumer demand through both retail and library markets with a suggested retail price of $13.95.

Additionally, Babes in Bucksnort can be ordered by retailers or wholesalers for the maximum trade discount price set by the author in quantities of ten or more from the Outskirts Press wholesale online bookstore at www.outskirtspress.com/buybooks.



ISBN: 9781432745004
Format: 6.14 x 9.21 paperback
SRP: $13.95
For more information or to contact the author, visit www.outskirtspress.com/babesinbucksnort


About Outskirts Press, Inc.

Outskirts Press, Inc. offers full-service, custom self-publishing and book marketing services for authors seeking a cost-effective, fast, and flexible way to publish and distribute their books worldwide while retaining all their rights and full creative control. Available for authors globally at www.outskirtspress.com and located on the outskirts of Denver, Colorado, Outskirts Press represents the future of book publishing, today.


Outskirts Press, Inc., 10940 S. Parker Rd - 515, Parker, Colorado 80134

http://outskirtspress.com 1-888-OP-BOOKS

"Laugh, Learn & Love" Book Review of "Babes In Bucksnort" June 11, 2010

Book Reviews of "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" and "Babes in Bucksnort"
By A Very Merry Shakespeare (NY, NY) 


This review is from: Babes in Bucksnort: Sister Mary Olga Fortitude Book 2 (Paperback)

Guys and gals - if you want to laugh out loud, and learn something at the same time, this is the book for you. Series of books, actually; the first book in this great set that I received in the mail was titled "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude". Now, Sister Mary Olga dwells at the Have a Heart convent in Bucksnort, Wisconsin. She is a true spiritual guide for everyone, and it shouldn't matter that she also has two things she loves - Marlboros and bourbon. When I began the first book, I quickly and completely fell into it and could not put it down; I was so entranced with the people on Dinkledorf Drive that I, literally, fell in love with each adn every one of them. I also was impressed at the way the author addressed many issues pertinent to the world today including religion and gay rights.


I moved on to the second book almost immediately because I was, by then, so wrapped up in these characters that I was laughing at a time when I truly needed to laugh and I wanted my happiness (and stress-relief) to continue. In the second novel, Priscilla Bunhead is one of those people that every small town in America has; she is the righteous busy body who can't stand the fact that there are atrocities in her world such as gay people infiltrating her town. She goes on a crusade, with the help of her millionaire friend, to call forth the wise and righteous Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead. This is the man who will clean up her town and force the gay people out of her neck of the woods. Not only do we have that storyline, but the author also introduces a character called Dimples Dufus who wants nothing more than to reclaim the fortune that Dimples left behind.


The spiritual wisdom that this author and his fantastic characters impart is truly a lesson in support, kindness, and love - things that some true Christians have forgotten over time. (Yes, that's my opinion so don't send horrible letters to the owner of this site). On a side-note, when characters are named Fartley and Dewdrop Dinkledorf, Ralphy Mayhem, Lilliliver Lipstick, and Father Cowberries, how exactly can a reader go wrong? I am so happy to have been introduced to this author and his series that I really can't wait for Book III: Have a Heart, to be released. Every once in a while a writer comes along who I believe should have more press and publicity, and Mr. Aujurd'hui is the newest one to make that list. Everyone go out and get these books and enjoy!

Author Davis Aujoourd'Hui

Sister Mary Olga Book Series:
Book #1 "The Mistadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"
Book #2 "Babes in Bucksnort"

THE EAGERLY ANTICIPATED SISTER MARY OLGA SEQUEL IS OUT!

Fans of "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" have said, “We couldn't put it down! When it was all over, we wanted more. We can't wait for the next book in the series!”

Fortunately, you won't have to wait long. The sequel to Misadventures is out. Whether or not you've read Misadventures, you'll be able to dive into the deliciously zany new tales without missing a beat.. Of course, you'll undoubtedly want to back up and read the first book, so that you can find out what outrageous stories have come before. Let me tell you a little bit about the new book.

"Babes in Bucksnort" is the sequel to the highly praised "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude". Once again the unconventional bourbon-swilling, chain-smoking nun will spin outrageously funny new tales about the residents of Bucksnort, Wisconsin while she tests the will of a reformed prostitute who just happens to be her Reverend Mother.

Unfortunately there is trouble brewing in the Snortlands. The nasty and notorious town busybody, Priscilla Bunhead, goes on a crusade to stamp out what she calls the gay menace. That's when she convinces her millionaire friend, Mildred Mayflower, to give away her fortune in order to bring the Reverend Billy-Bob Blunthead and his Born Again or Burn Forever Disciples for Jesus to town to do the job. It will be an uphill climb for them as the closet doors of many gay people in the Snortlands burst open.

Billy-Bob and his wife, Pinky Poo, will have another battle on their hands when Dimples Dufus, the heiress to the Mayflower fortune, arrives on the scene. They'll also have to reckon with a mysterious woman who channels an entity who challenges the hateful and hypocritical agenda of this spokesman for Jesus.

In between the laughs, Sister Mary Olga continues to dispense nuggets of spiritual wisdom during her classes in Beginner's and Advanced Holiness. Just don't take seats near the flatulent child named Fartley Dinkledorf or his lecherous one-hundred five year-old grandfather, Poopsy. The bottom line is that everyone is welcome in Sister Mary Olga's classes. Join the diverse cast of characters for a joy-ride that will tickle your funny bone until it aches.

Look for "Babes in Bucksnort" through Amazon.com. In the meantime, I am polishing up the next books in the series. Sister Mary Olga promises to be with you for one home run after another.

Humor in My Life - Part 6 - Recovery

Based upon my tales of drunken adventures, you may wonder why I think there is anything funny about addiction. The truth is that addiction is not funny. It's a disease. Having found some measure of recovery from it, I am able to look back upon things that didn't seem so funny at the time. That way I am able to detach from my shame and look upon the lighter side of life.

This is what I do in my series of books. Does Sister Mary Olga Fortitude have a drinking problem? I would say “yes,” but she's the one who has to come to that understanding for herself. The same would be true for the rest of us.

People don't usually come into recovery because they are simply looking for a better way of life. They are hurting and despairing. So much of that hurt is caused by the pain which they have tried to bury by using various forms of oblivion to seek comfort that doesn't endure.

Upon coming into recovery, a new way of living is opened up before them. As has been the case for me, I realized that all God ever wanted for me was to be happy. Of course, I had to take a searching look upon my past to see where I needed to make changes within myself or amends to others. In so doing, I practiced objectivity and compassion with myself as I looked at the shadow side of myself. I came to learn how to embrace my humanness without judgment.

Was it painful? Sure it was. Yet, as time went along, I realized there had been a lot of humor to those things which I hadn't found so funny in my past. I also realized that there was a silver lining to all those dark clouds. Every piece of my past has brought me to my today and for that I am grateful. I have come to embrace a life filled with more joy and serenity than I would have thought to have been possible.

This is the message of hope that I hold out to any of you who are locked in the chains of addiction. You may not even realize that you are in bondage. That's okay. Just try to take a look at my characters and to see whether or not you can relate. Also take a good look at those characters to whom you react. There is a reason for that too. Life is full of surprises. Some of them are wonderful. Some of them don't feel so good at the time.

Underneath it all, life is all good. It is a classroom that can help us find our pathway back to joy. In so doing, we blossom as we open up to the notion that we are indeed here for a purpose. The spiritual way of life is filled with happiness. For me that is derived from helping others in need.
"If any part of my blog is of any help to anyone else, my life will have served a greater purpose. If my books can make you laugh at yourselves or the absurdity of life, then I have accomplished my objective; that is to help people find a way to look upon the lighter side of life and to not take themselves – or life – too seriously."

Author Davis Auijourd'hu

"Misadventures of Sister Mary Olag Fortitude" (1st in a series of books to come)

2nd Blog -"The Funniest Satire Series of the Decade"

Humor in my Life -- Part 14 --- Gullible - Trusting

Okay! Let me recount another tale from my relatively new and naïve days as a social worker. This scenario involved a couple who came to me in what I perceived to be their hour of need.

I'll call them Jesse and Janie. Both of them had mental issues. Jesse was a schizophrenic and Janie had a mood disorder. As was the case with many of my coupled clients, they seemed to make strange bedfellows, but who was I to judge?

This particular wintry day, Jesse and Janie had an urgent need. Janie exclaimed, “I'm having my period and I don't have any tampons!”

A barefooted Jesse pointed at his feet and said, “Hey man, it's cold out! I need some money for sneaks.”

Being the person who handled their finances, I was naturally concerned. How could I possibly deny them their basic needs? I immediately authorized the necessary funds and handed in my request to my supervisor.

She gave me a knowing smile and said, “Seems to me that you're being conned.”

“Oh no!” I emphatically protested. “Jesse doesn't even have any shoes!”

“Okay,” she relented with a twinkle in her eye. “Don't worry. You'll get the hang of it.”

I resentfully left her office wondering how she could be so judgmental. After all, she hadn't even seen them!

Moments later, I handed the necessary funds to the couple who seemed to be appropriately appreciative. Satisfied that I had done my job well in addition to doing a good deed, I watched them heading to the stairwell just as a colleague was bringing in a pair of sneakers from the same stairwell.

“Look what I found!” exclaimed the fellow social worker.

“Hey lady!” shouted Jesse. “Those are mine!”

Janie turned to Jesse and whispered something in his ear. Then Jesse grabbed his sneakers and the two of them hurriedly rushed into the stairwell. As they did so, I recalled the voice of my supervisor. It would take me years to get past being so gullible, but in time I would learn. As for then, it was just another lesson in discernment.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Book: (1st in a series- full of fun and laughter) "The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude"

Facebook Fan Page

Blog 2- The Funniest Satire of the Decade