THROUGH THE OPEN DOOR - PART 7

We spent summers camping all over the northeast and we spent winters on the ski slopes. We truly enjoyed each other's company and we developed some enduring and intimate relationships that sustained us for years. It was a good life. I loved him so!

The years began to roll by as we settled further down into cozy domesticity. We bought our first home and we eventually had two cats and two dogs. Our circle of friends was tight knit and we had a larger circle of acquaintances. Life revolved around home, family, friends, and the bars. Happy hour was a regular part of our daily life.

While ten percent of the general population is alcoholic, it is estimated that more than a third of gay people are. My partner and I had little understanding that we were becoming alcoholics ourselves, but that would become another challenge within our individual and mutual life journeys. Recovery from alcoholism would come to both of us via Alcoholics Anonymous. That is part of my article entitled “Reaching for Recovery – Putting down the Drink.”

We weathered many sobering events over the years. Friends and close family members passed away. We watched in horror as scores of men we had known died from AIDS. We dealt with each other's active addictions and subsequent recovery. We maintained a close bond and were always a huge support to one another. We thought that our relationship would last for a lifetime.

We lived in a conservative gay town where there weren't many social or other outlets for gay people. Eventually our town began to embrace gay pride and we covertly attended those events. We were fortunate that both of our families had been very supportive from the start. They soon embraced us as a couple and included us in all family events.

One of the things of which I am most proud concerning my parents is that they co-founded a local chapter of PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) in my hometown. It became an important support group for other parents of gays who were coming to terms on their way to accepting their gay and lesbian children. Many years later, I beamed with pride when my then elderly parents were honored with a Rainbow Award for their contribution to the gay community. They had come a long way!

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" Book 1
"Babes in Bucksnort" Book 2

"Putting the Pieces Together" Kindle Version only for .99 cents!

Putting the "Pieces Together" is an anthology of a gay man's journey toward self-acceptance. It is a poignant and intimate book chronicling recovery from mental illness, sexual addiction, and alcohol.


Author Davis Aujourd'hui

THROUGH THE OPEN DOOR PART 6

I thought that I had burst out of the closet, but internalized homophobia is an insidious thing. It's all too easy to take on the negative judgments of others in this often bigoted society within which we live. I had come a long way, but I still felt uncomfortable letting my new coworkers know that I was gay; that is, until I got to know them much better.

The other part of my self-loathing came from my secret shame. Although I had pledged to be monogamous to my new partner, my old sneaky behaviors would soon surface. Lies and deception would only serve to sweep me under a dark current of despair. It would be the fodder for bouts of often suicidal depressions that would consume me over the next seven years until I finally put down the drink.

One of the most liberating experiences in our early relationship was attending our first Gay Pride parade in New York City. Along with half a million other gay men and lesbians, we walked down the streets of Manhattan holding hands. My spirit soared and, for that moment in time, I felt free.

My partner was a social worker and I soon joined the ranks of human services. That became one more thing we had in common. What neither of us realized was that we had been defining ourselves through exterior things such as our occupations, our sexualities, and the opinions of others. That especially translated to our opinions of each other.


I was making myself into what I thought he would want me to be. The confounding part was that I couldn't let go of my sexual addiction. What I have come to learn is that the basis for all addictions is codependency. Codependent was indeed what my partner and I were with one another. To the outside world and our ever-increasing circle of gay friends, we seemed like the ideal couple.


Life was good most of the time, but each of us was becoming increasingly dependent upon alcohol in addition to each other. We spent most of our time together. It felt nice, but it would become a set up for resentments later on. We spent our time together and with friends, but we didn't pursue individual outside interests.


Dysfunctional though we were, we seemed to be happy. It may not have been everything, but it was enough to sustain us. After all, we were on an uncharted journey toward unknown destinations. We were simply travelers on the sea of life. Thank God, we both had a willingness to explore what life was meant to be!


Books and Kindles by Author David Aujourd hui (these two below are at a special price on Kindle for $2.99)

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" Book 1
"Babes in Bucksnort" Book 2

“Putting the Pieces Together” - Now Available in Kindle for .99 cents

Kindle Edition .99 cents

“Putting the Pieces Together” is an anthology of a gay man's journey toward self-acceptance. It is a poignant and intimate book chronicling recovery from mental illness, sexual addiction, and alcohol.

The author's journey is a spiritual one. It begins with his challenge in accepting himself as a gay person. This challenge provided the seeds that would later result in addiction. He frankly talks about his attempt to escape his homosexuality by getting married to a woman. The marriage ultimately fails when he realizes that it's okay to be gay.


His journey is a story about moving from darkness to light. After years of experiencing devastating depressions, he became manic after putting down the drink. He comes to believe he is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ. He is finally treated for a bipolar disorder and eventually reaches a place of peace. Finally, the author tells his audience about how he developed his new career as the author of the Sister Mary Olga Fortitude series.


“Putting the Pieces Together” is a story of hope and faith. It is refreshingly honest. It is sad and funny. It is a story of personal triumph. It will touch your heart."

Blogtalkradio interview Of Author Davis Aujourd'hui By middaycoversations

You can listen to the interview if you missed it.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/middayconversations/2011/08/02/author-davis-aujourdhui-and-recording-artist-justin-cash

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Blogs:
http://bestsatireseriesofthedecade.blogspot.com/
http://authordavisaujourdhui.blogspot.com/

PROSPERITY CAN BE YOURS

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to have all the luck? It is not a matter of luck. It is a matter of applying spiritual principles to your life. Yet many people don't even know that's what they're doing. To them, prosperity just comes naturally.


Prosperity doesn't just refer to financial abundance. It applies to abundance in all areas of your life. This can include loving relationships, rewarding jobs, good health, in addition to money. Blessings will flow your way when you appreciate what already is. That will attract more of what you are seeking.

This has been the case with me. It is an example of faith. Instead of focusing on what I don't have or what displeases me, I shift my focus. This may be easier said than done, but it works. Gratitude is a good starting place, but truly appreciating what is present in your life is the pathway to prosperity.

As Esther Hicks would say, it all begins at a feeling good level. When you feel “good,” goodness naturally flows to you. That is why it is paramount not to let anything take you from experiencing consistent moments of joy.

Okay. Here is the normal starting point. You may experience a certain lack of abundance and that will normally make you want what you don't have. From that point, as Esther would say, you shoot off a rocket of desire. The thing is that you don't want to stay stuck in the problem. That will only attract more of what you don't want in your life.

You must necessarily accept that whatever is manifesting at present is for your best. Focus on being grateful and then allow yourself to feel deep appreciation for your blessings. You may not think you are blessed or that you are worthy. Don't stay stuck there. Instead, think of everything in your life that is good.

Without good health, you would have no quality of life. Hopefully you have that form of abundance present in your life. Use that as a starting point. Do you have shelter? Do you have adequate food? These are blessings many of us might take for granted. Allow yourself to feel that appreciation flow into your being. Continue to focus on whatever small or great blessings you may already possess. You will be amazed to realize how prosperous you already are. That is a wonderful starting point.

Shift your focus from anything that is negative. If you don't do so, you will attract more things about which will make you feel “bad.” Focus on that pathway to joy. If you can't feel it now, begin to climb the ladder to the next best feeling that will lead you higher and higher. Eventually, you will reach the place of joy.

Then be sure to practice awareness of anything that might take you from that place. Do not allow it. Surround yourself with positive people, places, and things that will assist you in feeling that joy from within.

Joy doesn't come from anything outside yourself. You can appreciate something like a beautiful sunset, but that is not what is making you happy. What is doing that is that you are connecting with your inner sense of wonder.

God, or what Esther would call Source, only wants the best for you. It is only you that can block yourself from experiencing prosperity. Practice affirmations. I am worthy of love. I enjoy and deserve to make money. I deserve a good job. I enjoy using my talents. I am a creative expression of the divine.

These are just some examples of affirmations. It's more important that you create your own. Practice them whether you believe them or not. Just try to believe. That is a good starting point. The more you practice affirmations, the closer you will come to believing them. Practice makes perfect. You are already perfect whether or not you realize you are. Prosperity is your birthright and it will be yours if but you only believe.


Author Davis Aujourd'hui

MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS

Every month should be used for raising awareness of those who are mentally-challenged such as myself. While I have been in remission from serious mental health problems for some time, I have the ability to empathize with those for whom the challenge goes on. It is no laughing matter.

Did you realize that, on an annual basis, over one-quarter of the population suffers from some form of mental health challenge? Highest on the list are those who suffer from clinical depression. This is a serious condition, lasting more than two weeks and up to months. It affects a person's ability to function on a daily basis. Women are more susceptible than men. It is a condition that can affect any age group, but is less prevalent among those over sixty.

Nearly six percent of the population suffers from a debilitating form of mental illness that prevents them from living a normal life. People with mood disorders such as a bipolar disorder involve about four percent of the population. The most serious form of mental illness – schizophrenia – affects approximately one percent of the population.

A host of other disorders makes up for the rest. These include anxiety disorders such as phobias, obsessive-compulsive disorder, panic disorders, and post-traumatic stress. Other problems include attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder, eating disorders, autism, and personality disorders.

Slightly under half of those who are mentally ill do not accept or receive adequate treatment. This leads them to suffer lives whereby they are deprived of realizing their potentials. Many of those who resist treatment end up on our streets as part of the homeless population. What a sad life for them!

Not only does the illness affect those who are afflicted, but it affects the family and friends of the mentally-ill as well. This has far-reaching implications on those who are affected, directly and indirectly. Mental illness affects a large percentage of our population.

What makes matters worse has been that health insurance companies have not treated mental illness like other physical illnesses. They have placed limitations on their coverage. This has led those affected to lose coverage for things like psychotherapy which provides a measure of relief. It's time that we wake up to the fact that an illness that affects the brain is as much of a physical illness as any other illness.

Awareness of the problem is the first step. Any of you can help to raise the consciousness of the larger whole. Like everything in life, compassion is the key. No man is an island. It is up to each of us to support our brothers and sisters. Without that support, people become isolated and disenfranchised. Nobody truly wants or needs to do it alone. Step up to the plate and be a friend to those in need.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Some helpful places if you find you need some help, need how to handle a situation or even just someone to talk to:

• The Trevor Lifeline - 866-488-7386 - http://www.thetrevorproject.org/
• American Foundation for Suicide Preventition - 800-273-talk http://www.afsp.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.viewPage&page_id=1 offers a large variety of information.
• Alcoholics Anonymous - http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=26 Support Group Locations and much more information

Never give up! There is help out there!

ACCEPTANCE

I believe that one of the greatest life challenges for most of us, is to come to a place acceptance. It's a matter of putting our lives into perspective with the greater whole. It's a means of coming to realize that acceptance is the answer to all of your problems or challenges for today.

How many of you tend to blame life's circumstances for your own? This can come in the form of blaming relationships, your job, your geographic location, your lack of money, lack of education, not to mention a host of other situations.

To accept, means to realize that everything in life – good and bad – happens for a reason. Because of this, it's so very important to forgive yourself for anything which you have been holding onto from your past.

Likewise, it is important to forgive others. Otherwise you will simply hold onto a toxic residue which will bring you no happiness. Whatever has happened has brought you to your today. And you're right where you're supposed to be in the cosmic scheme of things.

Life simply is. It's up to you to accept life on life's terms. It is also a matter of realizing that every choice you have made in your life has manifested in your own circumstances. You can't change the past, but you can chart a new course for your future by making right choices.

Amazingly, everything starts at the thought level. Whatever desire you send forth into the universe will necessarily manifest. Like attracts like.

When you put out a negative, it will eventually show up. The same is true for whatever positive energy you send forth. That's why it is so important to remain aware in the present. Even your thoughts are chosen.

Why would anyone choose something negative? What would be the reward? It would only spell out some form of human misery. Life is good and is meant to be about joy. That is a good starting point.


Follow your thoughts that lead to joy and that will become your experience. Take care not to judge yourself if you don't do it perfectly. After all, you're only human. By realizing this, you can give yourself a break.

Accept the grace that flows to you and share it with others. It will only increase your joy.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

DETACH WITH LOVE

Life is a matter of attaching and learning to let go. To attach yourself to anything or anyone will keep yourself as a prisoner. Do not allow yourself to be a victim. Let go of the attachment and detach with love.


What are some examples of persons or things you can attach yourself to? You can attach yourself to abusive relationships or to relationships with addicts. You can attach yourself to various addictions: drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, workaholism, compulsive buying, compulsive religion, or compulsive exercise to name but a few.

Now comes the big question. How do you detach? It will be a challenge. It will involve making a difficult choice. Perhaps it will mean having to leave a relationship. Perhaps it will mean giving up an addiction. It will involve an unfamiliar road and that can lead to fear.

The important thing to remember is that you are the only one who can do it. Do it as an act of love. You are the only one who can take care of yourself and you are worth it.

We are all given free will in this life. Everything we think or do is a matter of choice. We can do no wrong. Whatever path we follow is the right one for ourselves. This is why it is so important to forgive ourselves when we think we have made a mistake.

The point is that we can make choices that will lead us in a positive or negative direction. The question is, what would you prefer? Do you want to keep repeating the same mistakes or do you want to move forward to freedom?

The first key is to practice awareness. Focus upon your emotions. Anything that doesn't feel good will be an indicator that you would prefer to head in a different direction. Likewise, good feelings will indicate that you are moving in the matter of what would be your preference. Follow your joy and leave the rest behind.

Letting go is not an easy thing to do. It's human to attach yourself to anything outside yourself. The point is to follow what is the desire of your spirit. It will never lead you astray.

Practice prayer and/or meditation. Try journaling. Talk over your situation with another. Get professional help, if necessary. Join a support group. Any or all of these things will be helpful. It's up to you to reach out for help. No one has to do it alone, nor should they try. We can easily rationalize, make excuses, or get caught up in delusional thinking.

Take a leap of faith and let go of whatever is bothering you. Make the choice that only you can. Move forward and don't look behind. Just, whatever you do, do it with love.


Author Davis Aujourd'hui

JOIN THE HUMAN RACE

Do you feel alone and isolated? Do you feel as if you are the only person in the world? If you do, the answer is to join the human race.

You are each unique; but, underneath it all, you are the same. You are part of the whole of all creation. Yet to feel that way, you need to join hands and embrace your common humanity.

It is said that no man is an island. You do not need to do it alone. When you join with your brothers and sisters, you will feel a part of something greater than yourself.

Some people choose to say that is God. Some people simply experience it as being part of a family or group. Whatever is the case for you, allow yourself to share in the group experience.

Try to see your common identity with people that you might judge to be different than yourself. You will be amazed at the common bond you will feel. When you stop focusing on differences, you will align yourself with something that is greater than yourself. It will be a liberating experience.

To remain isolated and separate from the whole, your ego will lead the way. This will only lead to conflict. You will not remain at peace.

Do you want to find freedom? Do you want happiness? If that is the case, step aside from your ego. Identify and relate to others instead of comparing yourself against them. That only leads to judgment and a false sense of reassurance.

If someone has harmed you, do as Jesus said and turn the other cheek. That's not to say, let them walk all over you. Just walk away from the conflict and offer up love and forgiveness.

To take on a resentment, will only keep you locked in a prison of your own making. It will become a poisonous brew that will only hurt yourself. You deserve freedom. You deserve joy.

Allow yourself to align with that greater spirit that unites us all. That is the pathway to peace, freedom, and joy. That is the way to join humanity and become part of the human race.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Checkout Author Davis Aujourd'hui new Kindle  "Putting the Pieces Together" for $2.99


"Putting the Pieces Together” is an anthology of a gay man's journey toward self-acceptance. It is a poignant and intimate book chronicling recovery from mental illness, sexual addiction, and alcohol.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui on the Radio - the lets talk mom - the-radio-show

June 2, 2011 Broadcast

Guests – Davis Aujourd’hui, a retired social worker and author of "Babes in Bucksnort"; TS Wiley discusses results of a new study on estrogen and breast cancer aggression.

Topics Covered Page views; Intrepid Museum; Visiting Mars; Martians don’t talk; Bucksnort, Tennessee; 11 books in the series; Pronunciation and photo; Social worker for adult needs; Phillip’s look on the website; Yes, it’s obviously Phillip; Positive mental attitude toward healing; Estrogen and progesterone; Vascular effects; The Standard of Care; Estrogen in cream form; Wiley Protocol

“Who Sez That?!?” Frying pan handle and juice bowl.

To Listen to Broadcast click here - Scroll down to June 2, 2011 and there will be the recording!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

June is Gay Pride Month - CELEBRATE DIVERSITY

This is a guest post from a good friend of mine who is extremely talented. 
By joseph c. knudson




Have you ever felt as if you were the only person like yourself in the whole world? Guess what? You are. Each of you is a unique expression of the human experience. Your task is to embrace all that you are and to celebrate yourself.


Perhaps you’re in a minority group. You might be African-American, Asian, Latino, or gay. Perhaps you just feel as if you were a nerd. Some of the most famous people in history felt that way. They didn’t let that stop them from becoming all that they could be.

Look at Albert Einstein. He didn’t begin to talk until he was four years old. Yet he went on to become the father of atomic science. He met life’s challenges on life’s terms and became one of the most famous scientists in history.

Look at Maya Angelou. She was another person who didn’t talk for many years during a childhood as an abused African-American girl. Yet she went on to become one of our nation’s most prominent poets. She also served as an inspiration to another African-American girl who had been abused as a child. That was Oprah Winfrey. She became our most celebrated television talk show host and she served to inspire countless others whether of not they may have lived lives of oppression.

Each of you possess your own unique gifts which can serve to inspire others. The challenge is to embrace yourself so that you may discover what you have to offer. Surround yourself with people who affirm you and inspire you. That is the key to self-acceptance.

I have had my own challenges with self-acceptance. I didn’t want to be gay, but I eventually learned that it was a good thing. Along the way, I struggled with things like alcoholism, clinical depression, and sexual addiction.

I worked hard at becoming a champion and I am now a published author of a series of hilarious satires. I have learned to embrace things in my past that didn’t seem funny. I have made lemonade out of lemons as I have learned how to laugh at myself. In so doing, I have created a series of books that have made my readers laugh out loud.

It takes all kinds to make the world go around. Wouldn’t it be boring if that was not the case! I ask you to celebrate yourselves and to celebrate diversity. You can each make an individual difference for the betterment of life.

Go for your joy!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

CHALLENGE YOURSELF TO BE ALL YOU CAN BE

Do you feel as if you're not the person you would like to be? Do you feel as if your life is lacking meaning? Do you feel envious of others? Worse yet, do you feel as if you were a failure? Then it's time to challenge yourself – to be all that you can be.

As a young child, you may have had dreams. Perhaps those dreams never came to fruition. Perhaps those dreams changed along the way. No matter the case, it is imperative that you come to believe in yourself. Have faith that dreams come true.

As a young child, I wanted to become famous. Life challenges prevented that from happening. That's just as well. Fame would only have fed my ego which was based upon insecurities.

I am a survivor of a traumatic childhood. I suffered from years of suicidal depressions. I am also a recovering alcoholic and recovering sex addict. Years of therapy and twelve-step programs were the key to opening up my potential to become the person I had always wanted to be. Slowly, but surely, I learned to let go of those things that didn't serve my spirit as I also came to better know myself. Then I was in a position to grow and to realize dreams.

I'm still not famous, nor do I care if I ever am. What I am now is a successful author and that manifested from another dream I'd developed along the way. If I can realize my dreams, anyone can.

All of this can come to you if you're willing to take my challenge. Surround yourself with positive people, places, and things that you can emulate. Consider things such as letting go of self-destructive behaviors, going into therapy, joining a support group, or finding a church that feeds you positive messages based upon love, not fear. Become a part of a greater community. Break out of any tendencies to isolate. Get in touch with your spirit and focus on activities that make you feel good about yourself.

It's not an easy road to overcome life challenges, but it can be done. It takes a lot of work, but it will pay great dividends. Believe that you are worth it. Then begin a little at a time. It only takes baby steps, one day at a time, to move forward in a positive direction.

Face your fears and take those baby steps toward overcoming your hangups. Nudge yourself a little at a time. You can do it. It is simply a matter of taking charge of your life. Choose not to be an observer of your life. Be a participant!

It all begins with focusing on whatever inspires you and brings you to a place of joy. As you continue to follow your joy, amazing things will begin to happen. For one thing, it will bring you to a place of gratitude. Your whole attitude and outlook on life will change. Eventually, all kinds of good things will begin to come your way.

Positive thoughts and actions will manifest in positive results. You will develop a life filled with meaning as you let go of any judgments connected to your past. Whatever has come to pass has brought you to your now. The present moment is the place to begin.

Remain true to your emerging self as you come to know who you truly are. Take a good look at yourself as you learn to become more honest. It will involve taking a look at your strengths and weaknesses.

Focus on your strengths and be gentle with yourself as you look at your weaknesses. After all, you are only human as we all are. Do not compare yourself to others. Keep the focus on yourself. The good news is that you can let go of your weaknesses and turn them into strengths as you develop more awareness of your authentic self and the self you want to be.

What's past is past. Come to appreciate and accept what has been and what is. Look with eagerness to you future. Affirm and believe, you can be all you want to be. Dreams do come true.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

For some guidance with some challenges, I have created a Kindle E-Book call "Putting the Pieces Together" available at Amazon.com for $2.99 and you can purchase here

GIVE FORGIVENESS AS YOUR GIFT TO DAD ON FATHER'S DAY

Did you have a difficult upbringing? Perhaps your father was an alcoholic. Perhaps he wasn't supportive of you in some way. Perhaps he was overcritical. Perhaps he was an absent parent.

With the approach of Father's Day, this may be a difficult time of year for you to reconcile your feelings toward Dad. Give yourself and him a gift. Give him the gift of forgiveness.

So, you say you aren't ready? If that's the case, you're probably right. Your challenge now is to do the work that will bring you to a place of freedom. Otherwise, the past will hold you in bondage.

Did you feel rejected because you didn't like sports, weren't as favorite as your siblings, or because you were gay? Chances are, your father experienced these things too in his past. Everyone continues to act out their past on some level until they have healed themselves.

Maybe you were one of the lucky ones. Maybe Dad joined Alcoholics Anonymous and got sober. Maybe he came to value you as his gay child. Perhaps he joined Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. If this has been the case, you are truly blessed. Just remember to count those blessings and to let go of the past.

If you weren't so lucky, you will have to dig deep. Facing pain is never easy. Denial or blame is an easy defense. The problem is that you will never grow if you don't face your pain. You may also be denying yourself a chance to salvage a relationship with the man who gave you life.

Here are my suggestions to you:

 If you dad was or is an alcoholic, join Al-Anon. This is a program for family members of alcoholics. It will help you find a way to stop blaming and to open yourself to unconditional love.

 If you were traumatized by your father, seek therapy. Abuse or neglect can take place in so many forms. Forgiveness can be offered too quickly if you aren't ready to do so. You must first do the healing for yourself.

 If you were rejected or criticized by your dad, try a loving confrontation. Don't blame or accuse. Simply tell him how you felt. You never know when you can melt another's heart. Take the chance to open his and it will open yours too.

 If your father still doesn't approve of you - perhaps because you are gay; perhaps because you have an active addiction; perhaps because you are in a relationship with whom he disagrees - once again, approach him at a feeling level. Don't feel the need to explain yourself. Just let love lead the way. Don't be afraid to do this if you're a man. It takes courage. You possess it whether you realize it or not.

When you think you may be ready, you probably are. Now is the time to give the gift. Let your father know that you love him. Just as importantly, let him know you forgive him. Those will be the greatest gifts you could ever give.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

PRACTICING THE GOLDEN RULE

Love one another as you would love yourself. Wouldn't it be a perfect world if you could do it! The good news is that, with practice, you can. It is simply a matter of following what your heart tells you to do.


So, you've had challenges in your pasts. The question is, what can you do to undo the damage of what has come before? It's very simple. Just seek out the person who you may have wronged and apologize. If that person can't accept your apology, don't react. Just accept that the person is not in the place to forgive yet. Don't let your ego get in the way. Let it go.

This has been a life-long lesson for me and I still have a way to go, but I'm getting better with each passing day. What I've had to do is to remember that I'm only human. Then I've had to forgive myself for my errors of omission or commission. I encourage you to do this too.

Self-forgiveness is the first step toward freeing yourself from the trap of judgment. Without practicing it, you will only continue to beat up yourself. You can be your own worst enemy. Choose a better way. Freedom can be yours.

Look on the light side of life and realize that you are only human too. Nobody is perfect except within their souls. That's the place from which you want to draw in order to practice unconditional love. That means to accept the other person no matter who they are or what they do.

If someone slights you in some way, turn the other cheek. Don't let your ego react. Recognize that the other person is only human too. Remember all the loving qualities that person possesses. The pathway to unconditional love is not easy, but it's, oh so, rewarding. At all times, remember The Golden Rule.

Another important key to being in the right place to practice this important rule is to remain aware. Don't let your troubles stand in the way. Take time out to let them go. Spend some time meditating, go for a walk, or do anything that distracts you. Stay in the present moment. Then remember that life is good and that it's supposed to be about joy.

The most important thing is to not let anything take you away from your joy. If you can do that, nothing will ruffle your feathers. You may even see the humor in difficult situations. Just remember not to laugh inappropriately. That might just spell out trouble. Keep the joke to yourself unless you are sure it will entertain another.

Perhaps the most important lesson that Jesus taught was The Golden Rule. If only everyone practiced it, we wouldn't need The Ten Commandments. Lead the way by the power of your example. It will inspire others to follow suit.

Just continue to remain aware. Continue to affirm that you can do it. Then put it into practice. The rewards will be amazing. You will remain on the path of freedom and lead others to follow you. You can do it. Now is the time to begin!


Author Davis Aujourd'hui

BEING RESPECTFUL OF OTHERS WILL OPEN NEW DOORS OF UNDERSTANDING

Most of us have different lifestyles, religions, ethnic groups, cultures, and politics to name a few. By embracing the diversity of others, you will open new doors of understanding. You will create an atmosphere of tolerance that will help you to appreciate the uniqueness of others. It may also help them to appreciate you.

Respect breeds respect. It is only a matter of detaching from what you believe to be true and being open to learning. After all, life is a great teacher. It will lead to wisdom that will help you to navigate the waters of what can sometimes be a difficult journey.

Many of you have experienced prejudice in one form or another in your lifetime. You may be a member of a minority race. You may be gay. The list could go on and on.

For me, I have experienced prejudice as a redhead, as a gay man, and as a sex addict who is gratefully in recovery. I used to take on those judgments and feel “less than.” I choose not to allow that anymore. I recognize that I am a unique human being as each of you are. I celebrate who I am. You can do that too. You are deserving of respect and love and to offer that to others.

Unfortunately, you will not find that from everyone. That is because it is human nature to judge. Some people just don't like people who are different than themselves. Don't let that be your problem. Let is be theirs. Chances are, they don't like themselves very much. Perhaps you can just offer them a prayer and then let it go.

Now comes the real challenge. Look deep within yourself to see where you have judged others. It is amazing the different forms of prejudice that have contaminated each of you along your life journey. Choose to embrace an open attitude of tolerance. Also practice awareness of your thoughts, attitudes, and beliefs.

It will be amazing to see what bubbles to the surface. You will be surprised by those hidden judgments that you have been cultivating during your life. Examine each of them and see if you can remember where it came from.

You weren't born to practice judgment. You learned that along the way. Just remember to forgive yourself and whoever may have passed on those judgments to you. You and they didn't know any better because both of you were taught the same things along the way.

Each of you does the best you can, each step of the way, with what you knew about yourself as you went through your paces. The point is, that you can relearn negative messages about others. You can grow.

Choose not to remain stagnant. With an open mind, you will begin to appreciate all of the delicious diversity that life can offer. It will open new doors of understanding that will lead you to experience the beautiful tapestry of life.


Author Davis Aujourd'hui

GRATITUDE IS THE ANSWER

Whenever you are feeling down and out, there is a solution. Gratitude is the way. By counting your blessings, you will begin to see where life is good. From this perspective, you will begin to attract more blessings your way.

As Esther Hicks says, we live in a vibrational universe. There is a law of attraction at work. When you put out positive thoughts, it will manifest in positive results. When you put out negative thoughts, that will become your experience.

That puts total responsibility on you for creating your own reality. For many, this may be an uncomfortable notion. Many of you unconsciously to cling to things that make you feel bad. The good news is that, when you feel good, you will attract more and more things to feel good about.

It all starts at the thought level. That is why it is so important to remain aware. Every thought becomes a prayer and it is said, “Be careful of what you pray for. You might just get it.”

Years ago, Oprah Winfrey kept a gratitude journal. She was so amazed at the results that she encouraged her audience members to do the same. When you practice an attitude of gratitude and really feel it, you will also be amazed at what will become your experience.

Focus on what is. That will lead you to acceptance. When you can do that, you will be practicing appreciation. That's the most important stepping stone to your joy.

When you can remain in that place of joy, the abundance of the universe will flow to you. That will only lead to more appreciation. You will keep the flow going at an ever-increasing rate.

It's said that it's no good unless you give it away. This can be done in various ways. The most important way in which you can do that is to share your spirit of joy with others. Joy is contagious and will continue to spread outward into the universe like the waves on the ocean.

The other way you can do this is to share your material wealth with others in need. The more you share, the more abundance will flow to you. There is more than enough for everyone. Once again, the important thing is to keep the flow going. As you do this, you will inspire others to come to a place of appreciation. Blessings will flow in many directions.

The bottom line is to maintain that attitude of gratitude. It is the supreme gift you can give to yourself. From there, you can pass on the gift to others. Just remember to remain aware and to practice focusing on the positive. It will reap the results that you deserve.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui


Books and Kindles by Author Davis Aujourd'Hui

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" Book 1 Paperback and Kindle

"Babes in Bucksnort" Book 2 Paperbook and Kindle

NEW-NEW-NEW "Putting the Pieces Together" Kindle Format only $2.99

REACHING FOR RECOVERY (PUTTING DOWN THE DRINK) Part 9

I did go to a rehab since I realized that my sexual addiction could have placed my sobriety from alcohol in jeopardy. I chose an alcohol rehab that indicated they also dealt with sexual addiction. I would become disappointed that I didn't receive the kind of help I had hoped to receive.

What I did obtain was another thirty days of sobriety from alcohol and my first same period of sobriety from sex. I left rehab feeling depressed, but I now had nearly three months of abstinence from alcohol. I've never had a problem with alcohol since. The way I achieved that grace was by not drinking one day at a time.

AA opened the door to a joyous new way of life for me. Through the program, I developed a network of supportive new friends. I began to learn that I could be even happier without picking up a drink. I focused on sticking with positive influences. It all boiled down to people, places and things. Dealing with my sexual addiction would become the new and continuing challenge. Even so, I was on the road to a new life without bondage to the alcohol addiction that could have easily killed me.

Not drinking was just the first part of my recovery. The larger challenge was, and continues to be, living life on life's terms. It has required an attitude adjustment of maintaining a positive attitude and counting my blessings.

The part of my journey into recovery from sexual addiction began nine months after I stopped drinking. What I've had to do since my recovery journey began has been to deal with my feelings. I've also had to learn how to take care of myself spiritually, mentally, and physically. It's a balancing act and it's not easy.

The twelve step program has given me an outline for living a sober and spiritual life. It has involved letting go of the past, taking a good hard look at what I have needed to work on, making amends to those I have harmed, and developing a spiritual relationship with God. All of this has required work and surrendering my ego in order to allow God to help me with my life challenges. That's a daily act of surrender. I do it with joy. Spirituality is the most important ingredient for me to maintain a happy life.

I don't do it perfectly. As with any twelve-step program, AA provides a framework for making progress rather than perfection. What I have been able to achieve is a life filled with a sense of purpose. I have reclaimed many of my previous interests that I'd let slip away when I had been in the grips of addiction.

Some of these things have been playing the piano, singing, and spending more time with sober friends and family. I've also developed wonderful new interests which have included my writing. None of this would have been possible while I had been in bondage to addiction. It's an example of how God has done for me what I could not have done for myself.

I love my life today! That's not to say that life is easy. It's just that I now have the tools I had been missing in order to deal with life's challenges. I have no regrets about the past. I can see where everything that's happened in my life has served a greater purpose.

Even those things that had seemed terrible had actually been clouds with silver linings which contained hidden blessings. They have brought me to my today and today I am a transforming person who sees life with new eyes. I have self-esteem and, for the most part, I have a positive attitude. All of that comes from the grace I have received. For that, I am grateful!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

REACHING FOR RECOVERY (PUTTING DOWN THE DRINK) Part 6

I let go of my drinking behaviors using AA meetings as a substitute, going to as many as four meetings on some days. I was a quick study and had no problem embracing the first three steps when I made that daily decision to turn my will over to my Higher Power. God was indeed good to me, relieving me of the compulsion to drink within the first week.

The only problem was, I turned to my primary form of medication – sex - with a vengeance. After leaving my last AA meeting of the day at 11 PM, I was off on the cruising circuit. I would drive to those parks or pornographic bookstores where I would lose both myself and lose sleep as I acted out my pain through sexual oblivion, usually with multiple partners. Still, that did not fill up the empty hole of need that only God could fill.

Even so, I followed the suggestions that were offered by the program as if my life depended upon it. I truly believed that I would not have lived out the year had I continued my final binge with alcohol. Normally, same-sex sponsors are recommended; however, I heard a wise person say, “when picking a sponsor, one should consider that there are actually six sexes.” As a gay man, this made sense to me. Consequently, I eventually picked an older lesbian whose long-term sobriety I admired to be my sponsor.

In the meantime, I had asked another gay man to serve as temporary sponsor. I felt safe with him. His gentle manner reminded me so much of my conception of Jesus. As it turned out, I used them both as sponsors, calling on them along with others in the program every day. This became my lifeline to sanity and there was nothing I wanted more than that!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Reaching for Recovery (Putting Down the Drink) Part 5

The story of how I finally accepted my alcohol problem was a spiritual one. I had finally realized I had a problem with alcohol once my partner left me. I stopped drinking cold turkey for a long weekend during which he had come back to visit. What I hadn't realized was that I would need help in order to stay sober.

After my partner left, I went to the refrigerator to get some leftovers to warm up. I had promised myself that I wouldn't drink, but I saw a single Budweiser bottle and I thought to myself that one beer wouldn't hurt. That beer took the edge off. That's when I spotted the leftover bottle of gin which I thought I might as well drink as long as I was quitting booze.

The thing is, I wanted more and I started to feel desperate. I didn't think I had any other alcohol in the house. Then I remembered a bottle of Tequila that someone had had the nerve to give us after a trip to Mexico. I hated Tequila, but I thought it might be tasty mixed with Lemonade; so I proceeded to drink the entire contents.

As I was drinking, I started to become melancholy; and, for some reason, I decided to call my partner's former lover who was then living in Atlanta. He was very patient and kind as I proceeded with a drunken apology for having stolen his lover some eight years ago. He told me that he forgave me and that I didn't need to beat myself up. I couldn't understand what he was talking about, but the tone of his voice and his forgiving attitude was very soothing to me.

Perhaps I was aware that he was in recovery from alcohol abuse, though it didn't enter my conscious mind at that point; however, some time later in the conversation, he asked me if I wanted help. Instead of angrily reacting with an “F---You!” I cried out, “Yes!” as I broke into sobs.

Then, somehow, all the way from Atlanta, this dear man got help to me from a local Alcoholics Anonymous clubhouse. Sometime before midnight, two fellows from AA showed up on my doorstep. They took me, wearing my leftover food on my sweater, to the clubhouse where several other members had stayed long after the last meeting of the day to help this drunk.

I don't remember what they said to me, but I do remember the kindness they demonstrated as they talked with me over coffee. I also realized that they knew the kind of personal hell I'd been going through and they held out the hope I desperately needed. I was given a schedule of AA meetings and I was driven home. The next morning I awoke with a hangover and called into work requesting a sick day. Then I went back to that same clubhouse at 7AM for my first AA meeting.

God was with me through that day - April 6, 1988. I ran into an old friend who came home with me and showed me the affection I desperately needed at that point. I stopped by my parents' home for a visit. They had been very concerned since I'd called them the previous night, in my drunken state, to tell them I was being taken to Alcoholics Anonymous. I went from their home to a session with my psychotherapist. Then I followed that up with my first gay AA meeting. There was so much love there among those courageous people who held out more hope for me. I realized I was finally home.

Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Celebrate Diversity - Author Davis Auhourd'hui

CELEBRATE DIVERSITY- Author Davis Aujourd'hui

Posted on May 20, 2011 by joseph c. knudson

This is a guest post from a good friend of mine who is extremely talented.  Please enjoy the article and check out his sites listed here:


http://bestsatireseriesofthedecade.blogspot.com/ - Author Davis Aujourd'hui and his "Sister Mary Olga" Book Series

http://authordavisaujourdhui.blogspot.com/ - Author Davis Aujourd'hui Blog

Sincerely,


J.C. Knudson, Author of "Living the Difference"
http://www.outskirtspress.com/livingthedifference

Celebrating Diversity

Have you ever felt as if you were the only person like yourself in the whole world? Guess what? You are. Each of you is a unique expression of the human experience. Your task is to embrace all that you are and to celebrate yourself.


Perhaps you’re in a minority group. You might be African-American, Asian, Latino, or gay. Perhaps you just feel as if you were a nerd. Some of the most famous people in history felt that way. They didn’t let that stop them from becoming all that they could be.

Look at Albert Einstein. He didn’t begin to talk until he was four years old. Yet he went on to become the father of atomic science. He met life’s challenges on life’s terms and became one of the most famous scientists in history.

Look at Maya Angelou. She was another person who didn’t talk for many years during a childhood as an abused African-American girl. Yet she went on to become one of our nation’s most prominent poets. She also served as an inspiration to another African-American girl who had been abused as a child. That was Oprah Winfrey. She became our most celebrated television talk show host and she served to inspire countless others whether of not they may have lived lives of oppression.


Each of you possess your own unique gifts which can serve to inspire others. The challenge is to embrace yourself so that you may discover what you have to offer. Surround yourself with people who affirm you and inspire you. That is the key to self-acceptance.

I have had my own challenges with self-acceptance. I didn’t want to be gay, but I eventually learned that it was a good thing. Along the way, I struggled with things like alcoholism, clinical depression, and sexual addiction.

I worked hard at becoming a champion and I am now a published author of a series of hilarious satires. I have learned to embrace things in my past that didn’t seem funny. I have made lemonade out of lemons as I have learned how to laugh at myself. In so doing, I have created a series of books that have made my readers laugh out loud.


It takes all kinds to make the world go around. Wouldn’t it be boring if that was not the case! I ask you to celebrate yourselves and to celebrate diversity. You can each make an individual difference for the betterment of life. Go for your joy!

Author Davis Aujourd'hui's Book Series:

"The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude" (Book 1)
"Babes in Bucksnort" (Book 2)

Both are available in Paperback and Kindle Format. Kindle Format is just $3.99

Enjoy!